Updated: May 24, 2021
I believe that everyone should prioritize practicing some good ole self-love—married, single, or dating. Why? The answer is simple, yet deceptively easy to forget. Everyone deserves love, especially from the most important person in your life – YOU. It took me a few years of (unknowingly) running on “E” and an unfortunate trip to rock bottom before I truly understood this. I’ve realized that without self-love, you can’t “show up” in the world like you’re meant to.
But let’s be honest—practicing self-love can be challenging at times, and its definition can be totally different depending on the person. With this in mind, what better time than Valentine’s Day to make a commitment to yourself? It’s time to care and do more for you—mentally, physically, spiritually and/or emotionally.
In light of the season, I encourage you to pause for a second and think about what would really fill your love tank and meet your needs this holiday. This doesn’t have to be something extravagant or expensive. Remember: small steps are still steps.
To get you started, here are 6 ideas to give YOU some love this Valentine’s Day:
Buy something—flowers, shoes, a slice of cake, a mani/pedi, or whatever might help sweeten the day. Although receiving gift from a significant other or friend is great and special, you can give an equally-kind gesture to yourself. Affirm your own value by treating yourself to something nice. And yes—you deserve it! Guilt not included.
Try a new recipe
Although we’ve finally reached 2021, the looming effects and restrictions brought on by the pandemic are far from over. Use this occasion as a priceless opportunity to try a fancy new Valentine’s-inspired recipe, complete with table settings, candles, and your favorite bottle of wine. Pinterest is a goldmine for ideas! If you’re not particularly skilled in the kitchen, that’s okay too. You can take this on as a new challenge. Alternatively, if you d*mn near set the place on fire when attempting to cook, I recommend patronizing a nice restaurant and ordering takeout. Pull it all together some nice table décor, and voilà. You have masterfully crafted a romantic dinner for two: you and your stomach.
Create a feel-good playlist
If you’re like me, music is life! Thanks to the mood-changing powers of some great tunes, I recommend making a playlist for the weekend of the songs that make you feel good, sexy, or motivated. For me, my feel-good playlist is full of hits from the early 2000’s (AKA the golden era of boy bands, TRL, and glitter gel pens). As soon as the intro of “Everybody” by Backstreet Boys starts, I immediate hit the floor because #nostalgiaoverload. That’s one of my happy places. So, choose something that gets you moving. Even if you feel less than festive, don’t underestimate the mood-switching capabilities of a good song. Just try it!
Book a staycation
If you feel comfortable, book a room at a nice hotel in your hometown as a mini getaway. Now, let’s be clear, y’all: I’m not talking about the Heartbreak Hotel. Remember, we have Mary J Blige’s “Just Fine” on our playlist, NOT “I’m Going Down”. Sometimes, a simple change of scenery works wonders. I did this for my 33rd birthday this year, and it was amazing! You can spend time journaling, soaking in the tub with a bath bomb, or snuggling in a plush robe while counting your blessings. Do your research on what COVID-19 safety protocols are in your area, and see if a staycation is possible.
Express how much you love your family/friends
Be proactive and connect with the special people in your life who love and encourage you. Call, text, video chat, etc. Sometimes, the best way to feel love is to simply give it! If 2020 taught us anything, it’s that tomorrow isn’t promised. Don’t wait to express yourself and your feelings. You’ll be doing yourself a favor—your loved ones will probably remind you just how amazing you are, too.
Deactivate Social Media
Social media will undoubtedly be filled with sweet shout-out posts, renewed wedding vows, and proclamations of new love. Unfortunately, if you are someone who is currently on the path to healing or not quite comfortable yet in singlehood, things like this can be ultra-triggering. I get it. But don’t be envious; instead, choose to stay off social media! Seriously—don’t hurt yourself by pain shopping. It’s 100% okay to temporarily deactivate or just delete the icon off your phone for a day (or two, because algorithms).
Whatever you decide to do, be good to yourself! Let me know in the comments what your plans are this year.
Hugs, Kisses & Valentine wishes,